Possible effects of the festivities & remedies!!!

Christmas Party, After Effects
 1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet.
Cause- Glass is being held at incorrect angle (You are pouring the drink on your feet).
Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward

2. Symptom: The wall facing you is full of lights.
Cause : You’re lying on the floor.
Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.

3. Symptom- The floor looks blurry.
Cause : You’re looking through an empty glass.
Cure: Quickly refill your glass!

4. Symptom: The floor is moving.
Cause : You’re being dragged away.
Cure: At least ask where they’re taking you!

5. Symptom-You hear echoes every time someone speaks.
Cause : You have your glass on your ear and trying to drink from it
Cure: Stop making a fool of yourself!

6. Symptom: Your dad and all your brothers are looking funny.
Cause : You’re in the wrong house.
Cure -Ask if they can point you to your house.

7. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and the music is very repetitive.
Cause : You’re in an ambulance.
Cure- Don’t move. Let the professionals do their job!!!

My Birthday Prayer

I am happy with my life. It’s a beautiful life. But I want more with what I am. And my forever prayer, especially today, remains:

Birthday Prayer

O little St. Theresa of the Child Jesus, who during your short life on earth became a mirror of angelic purity, of love strong as death, and of wholehearted abandonment to God, now that you rejoice in the reward of your virtues, cast a glance of pity on me as I leave all things in your hands. Make my troubles your own – speak a word for me to our Lady Immaculate, whose flower of special love you were – to that Queen of heaven “who smiled on you at the dawn of life.” Beg her as the Queen of the heart of Jesus to obtain for me by her powerful intercession, (the grace*) I yearn for so ardently at this moment, and that she join with it a blessing that may strengthen me during life. Defend me at the hour of death, and lead me straight on to a happy eternity.

Amen.

*I may give glory to Jesus by example and not only in words. Take away my quick temper and help me love everyone for what they are and not what I want them to be.

Dear Reader, I seek your prayers and blessings today. Please do remember me in your prayer time. Thank you so much in advance.

Here’s a beautiful poem by St.Therese which beautifully expresses my aspirations:

 Oh! how I love Thee, Jesus! my soul aspires to Thee –
And yet for one day only my simple prayer I pray!
Come reign within my heart, smile
tenderly on me,

 Today, dear Lord, today.

But if I dare take thought of what the morrow brings –
That fills my fickle heart with dreary, dull dismay;
I crave, indeed, my God, trials and sufferings,

But only for today!

O sweetest Star of heaven!
O Virgin, spotless, blest,
Shining with Jesus’ light, guiding to Him my way!
O Mother! ‘neath thy veil let my tired spirit rest,

For this brief passing day!

Soon shall I fly afar among the holy choirs,
Then shall be mine the joy that never knows decay;
And then my lips shall sing, to heaven’s angelic lyres,

The eternal, glad today!

-Saint Therese of Lisieux
June 1894

I have a question

Each time something related to my son reminds me of my husband or my son points out to his daddy in a photograph, I clam up not knowing how to deal with the scene.

I would like to request your thoughts on the subject. Here are some details:

Ever since I applied for a divorce, my husband has completely disappeared from our lives. Except the occasional meet in the court, we have never heard from him. He doesn’t call to check even on his son. I am waiting for the divorce to come through so we all can move on with our lives. But he refuses to sign the papers.

On the advice of the court counselor, for a month in September 2012, he made some efforts to show that he has changed and that he wants me and his son in his life. But a week before the court date in November 2012, he disappeared again and haven’t made any contact at all.

However, though barely 2 ½ years old, my son has memories of that month with him. He can identify his father from a photo in which he is visible only from waist down.

Although I know we are advised against divorces AND Jesus would rather that we sacrifice than separate from our spouses, I am unable to return to my husband for the emotional and physical emptiness in the marriage is too devastating. And the general atmosphere in that house is depressing. I absolutely refuse to raise my son in such a place where he would grow up as emotionally messed up as his father.

It’s not that I have someone else in my life or that I want to marry again. On the contrary. All I want is a good and peaceful life for my son. The divorce is just because I need closure. And I need money.

I have invested a huge sum of money in a house we bought together, which has put me in a financial spot. But the house is now lying vacant (I think) and he’s got his name on it. And he is not showing any signs of returning just my share of money that I have invested in it. I therefore, had to resort to legal action.

I digress.

So my question to you all is – I have no negativity towards my husband. But the wounds are still too fresh. I also have NEVER stopped him from seeing his son or being part of his life. I sometimes feel terrible for my son that he is missing out on his father. But the man himself doesn’t seem interested. However, I do not want to instill any negativity into my son’s mind about his father. So how do you suggest I talk to my son about him? I mostly never talk about the man at all thereby avoiding the uncomfortable task of ‘handling’ the matter. But how long?

I want my words and actions to be an example to my son. I want to break the chain of insecurity, jealousy, emotional apathy and complete disregard for others’ needs. I need wisdom to deal with my son so that he grows up to be a whole person.

I just am at a loss as to how. How do I safeguard my son from the evils of a divorce? How do I teach him by example the Christian way of living (when I have already broken one rule 😦  ).

As long as my son is too young to understand much, I am ok. But soon the questions will come. Then what? How I deal with everything will set the stage for how he perceives relationships, emotions and goodness. I would be grateful for any suggestions on this.

Letter from a son

Don’t worry that your children never listen to you, worry that they are always watching you.

My friend’s son has moved out of his parents house to attend college and was unable to attend their 25th wedding anniversary. He therefore, sent the following email:

Dear Muma and Papa,

Usually on occasions like these, one sends gifts and cards to show the love that there is for those closest. At this point of time I hope to be a little more explicit in telling you how much I love you both, and there simply isn’t  anything I can buy and/or send that would do that job accurately enough for me.

But first, a little about me. When I came to Bangalore I did think that I would be leaving the person I am behind and becoming a reformed individual, ready to face what the world is going to throw at me. Exciting as that may sound, having spent an ample amount of time here, I have come to realise that the individual I am, doesn’t need much improvement. May not be the best at everything, but I do have the characteristics that really matter. Those are the things that no one can teach you at this stage in life, but they come coded within from birth and are enforced only by family. You have made me how I am today and am forever grateful to you for that. You have taught me how to handle every situation, good or bad, how to look beyond the obvious and how to think using the mind and the heart. Wherever I reach in life (physically and mentally), the one constant thing that has always been, and will always stay there, is you.

I may not call everyday, and sometimes not even message, but not an hour goes by when you are not with me. Even when I say to someone after a long day at college, ‘lets go home’, I always correct myself and say ‘lets go to the hostel’. Home is where the heart is, and my heart is with you.

Even on my birthday, I was upset that I was unable to meet you and for that matter, even talk to you at length, because of the work there was that day. I did come over the very next day, and that was great, but during that time, I did realise that life is going to be like this. That work is going to take priority, but never preference. It will take you far from family, but it can never take you apart. And here I am in the same situation on your anniversary, feeling rather upset that I am not around you, consoling myself that the only thing good about this situation is that you celebrate this anniversary the same way you celebrated your first 🙂 Was also upset when you had to cancel the anniversary celebration because of factors outside of our control, but even at that time, you taught me through example about how to handle myself in such times. I look forward to meeting you in December.

You have been my earliest and best friends. You have always given me something to aspire to be, and I’m sure life has given you hardships as well, but you have always shielded me from them, even if I didn’t want you to. Somewhere inside one of my biggest worries is whether I would be able to ever match up to the both of you as a parent one day, and whether I would be able to always offer the best to my family, like you have.

Muma, you have always been there as my strength. You somehow manage to love me at times when I’m not very fond of myself. You always have just the right thing to say, be it the thing I need to hear, or the thing I want to hear. And how much ever I hate to admit it, you are always right. You always put all of us ahead of yourself. Even right now I know you are thinking about when I managed the time to write this letter to you, and why I am not studying instead. You are the force that holds us together. The strength that keeps us moving forward.

Papa, throughout my life, you have been my hero. If I am able to be one tenth the man you are in your mind, and in your heart, I would consider myself more than successful. 

Your ability to make us smile and laugh is one of the greatest things in the world. You have always been the light that shows the correct path. The face reader we had met some time ago could spot just from a photo of you that you are truly the ‘Kalyug ke Raam’. To us, this information came as no surprise, was just good to hear it from someone else. I still remember the days when I would wait for you at around 6PM and you would come home and I would come running to you. The size of that little boy may have increased, but inside I am still the same person.

So here is wishing you a very very happy anniversary.

As someone who has seen the both of you throughout life, I can say for sure that i have truly been in the company of pure love, of two people no better suited for anyone but each other. People who in their own way are great as individuals, and even greater as a couple.

Here is to celebrating the 1st 25, and looking forward to the next…

Warm regards,

 your son

As I read this poignant note, I had to take atleast 2 breaks to compose myself and to continue reading. I felt that if my son would feel even half of what is written above then I would consider it my parenting success.

The reason for posting it here is to let you parents out there have a feel of what your children may actually be thinking of you and haven’t really let you know. Children are very perceptive. They observe you. They learn. They emulate. And it’s for keeps. A quote I love to remember is:

Live so that when your children think of fairness and integrity, they think of you.